With so much going on in the world today, it’s possible that politics might come up while you’re on a date.
It’s usually a good idea to avoid the topic altogether, but completely avoiding the issue can make you seem aloof or uncaring. So here’s how you can show interest and compassion without turning your first date into a Model UN session.
Should You Talk Politics on the First Date?
The consensus among daters is that not talking about religion or politics at a party or when dating is ideal. Even five years ago, you would likely be able to get a few weeks into a relationship, and sometimes even a month or more, without bringing up politics at all. Now, however, politics is a much more talked about topic and the focus of many people’s conversations. Many have gravitated towards friend groups who think like them. However, you’ll likely come across people of different political affiliations and beliefs in the dating world. When meeting up with someone, you’ll need to decide when to bring up politics and whether or not the old adage of not talking politics works for you.
Navigating Opposing Beliefs is Difficult
Navigating opposing political beliefs in a romantic setting is no easy feat. That said, people find a better time of it in casual relationships. Either way, over 25% of Democrats and over 25% of Republicans view members of the opposing political party as a threat to the nation’s well-being. This means a percentage of people higher than 25%, where political leanings significantly impact whether or not they would date someone. This means talking about political beliefs relatively early in the dating process may be ideal for many people. Get it out of the way relatively quickly rather than spending a few months building up to talk about politics only to find that the other person isn’t a compatible match. That said, extensive talks about politics aren’t needed either, so start with the basics and then set it aside.
Decide For Yourself What You Need
Decide for yourself if you can have a loving, open-minded relationship with someone who ascribes to opposing political ideologies. Some people already know they cannot, while others need more information. Either way, make sure you figure it out before getting too deep into things.
Listen Politely Whether You Agree or Not
The goal of a date is to get to know another person, and plenty of people with different political ideologies spend their entire lives together. Listening can be one of the hardest things to do when somebody with an opposing political belief starts chatting with you. Often, people talk over each other, interrupting the other person when they hear something they don’t like. However, try to listen respectfully and think about what the other person is saying before responding. When talking about politics and many other topics, people often think about what they will say next even while the other person is still talking. The way people deal with more challenging conversations is a sign of how they will be in different types of arguments. If another person doesn’t hear you out while you defend your views on things like healthcare, they may not hear you out on other topics as the relationship progresses.
Think About Your Goals
Think about your goals. Getting together with somebody for a casual sexual experience is different than finding someone to marry and spend the rest of your life with. Some people choose not to talk about politics because the entirety of the relationship is about physical fun. The decision to talk about politics or not can be made with honest communication between two people early on, depending on their goals. It’s essential to communicate your needs, wants, and desires with the people you’re interested in so your views align.
Avoid Taking The Conversation Hostage
People don’t like being talked at, and discussions about politics often end up this way. So rather than talking on and on, make sure to pause and give the other person a chance to get a word in.
While you might be enthusiastic about specific topics, the best way to chat with other people about politics is to have a cordial conversation. That said, some issues might ignite a particular passion within you. Use these conversations to get more information about whether the other person could be a compatible match, whether for casual fun, long-term fuck buddy friendships, or long-term relationships. Remember, your conversation is not on a podium or stage.
Remember That You Don’t Know it All
With the political landscape being arguably more intense than ever, a rational discussion can be more complicated due to the sheer amount of information. Remember that you don’t know everything and be open to admitting when you don’t have all the information on a particular issue. Many different pieces of information are being tossed around in the media, and it’s not always true. Keeping track of what’s real and what’s not has become much more challenging, especially since the advent of social media.
In addition, a lot is happening in politics at a rapid pace. Most people cannot devote their entire day to navigating news articles, studies, and other sources of information. While keeping up with current events is important, obsessing over them and spending all of your time on them isn’t always healthy. It’s okay to let the other person know that you’re not aware of specific topics or pieces of information, and this can also be a great way to move the conversation forward.
Don’t Try to Change Their Mind
It’s also vital to avoid trying to change the other person’s mind while you’re on a date. The chances that you’ll be able to do this on a first date are very slim, and it’s a great way to talk yourself out of getting a second date.
Political Discussions Don’t Have to be the Kiss of Death
Carry on conversations that are thoughtful, tactful, and respectful. Whether you decide to have conversations on the first date, fourth date, or 10th date, politics will eventually come up. Decide when and find the ideal opportunity to give talks about personal politics a go.
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